Honey Locust Sangha
Omaha Community of Mindful Living
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CTC Minutes November 2022
 
The Caretaking Council (CTC) for Honey Locust Sangha met Sunday November 22 via Zoom. In attendance were Patrice Watson (facilitator), Tina Ray, Mike McGann,  Mark Watson, Juanita Rice (note-taker), Jim Cox, and Dave Watts. Unable to attend: Catherine Stremlau, Mike McMahon.  Our opening prayer for a harmonious meeting seemed sweet and warm as usual and we had a brief few moments of silent mindfulness to set that intention.
 
Agenda Item 1: Treasurer’s report. We have $2834 (Paypal $1091; Union Bank $1743).
 
Agenda Item 2: Update from the retreat committee, which includes progress on 2023 Winter Day of
Mindfulness (DOM), 2023 Spring Retreat, and an update on teachers for coming gatherings and 2024 Spring Retreat.
 
WINTER DAY OF MINDFULNESS (DOM) to be held February 4th or 11th (backup date) from 9am – 3pm via Zoom with ‘in-house teachers” (ourselves).  A possible theme might be “Amplifying Diverse Voices” or “Raising our Voices in Support of Diversity.” We would plan a Dharma talk about expanding our perspectives (Inclusiveness). And a panel presentation to introduce diverse voices that inspire:  artists, teachers, etc. Diverse voices might be Gender Variance (diverse perspectives on gender and/or sexuality) and/or Diverse Ethnicity  --what is generally called BIPOC perspectives (Black, Indigenous, People of Color) meaning all non-white or non-European—Asian, Hispanic, etc.—or also Neurodivergence or Able Divergence. 
Difficulty of language. The committee acknowledges that even to begin to talk about and listen to such realities, ones we all recognize, we encounter language issues.  Many people are generally embarrassed and over-apologetic about being “correct” in the various ways of naming differences and prejudices and discrimination or oppression or persecution. Especially, since most of our sangha are of European descent (“white”) and middle-class (with little experience of prejudicial suffering) who feel comfortable with our perceived genders and our sexuality.  And even between society’s approval of the “appropriateness” of our behavior (feminine and masculine, for instance. Suggestions. We should probably try to be courageous and follow our kind impulses and curiosity.  If we try too hard to be correct and to sound respectful, we may fear to speak at all. Such hypervigilance may deprive us of the full benefit of honest and considerate discussion. Etiquette.  The committee noted that Tina Ray had some useful observations about “right language.” The guideline might be, as Emily Post suggested about etiquette, that we aspire to good manners, and define good manners begin with consideration for the feelings of others*. (See *PS.) Use language that helps others to understand you with the goal of inoffensive open communication. If we show good intentions in both our speaking and our listening and openness (our acceptance when challenged by others with different perspectives), we will all learn.  And we will find trust.  
Agenda Item 3: Spring Retreat 2023. Our Dharma teachers will be Terry Cortes Vega and “BK” (Brian Kimmel). BK is a newly ordained Dharma Teacher in the Plum Village lineage of Thich Nhat Hanh and formerly visited us as apprentice or assistant with Terry. So it has been specified joyously that Terry and BK* (See *PS) have agreed to take equal responsibility. The retreat would be hybrid, with at least some events on zoom.  And we will resume our pre-Covid lodging system, with the default being shared bedrooms and private bedrooms available for an extra fee, because there is such limited lodging at the Creighton Retreat Center near Griswold, Iowa.  BK will present us with an opportunity to observe awareness of gendered oppressions; he has requested that we not use he/him or she/her pronouns to refer to “them.”* (See PS).
 
 
 
Agenda Item 4: Appraisal of Monday night hybrid meetings. We agreed that in general our hybrid arrangements are becoming pretty comfortable for everyone both online and in person,  The key to this adjustment is the in-person sangha’s cooperation in learning to set up the studio (without some of our former leaders) and to set up the Zoom equipment (audio and video) as more people have learned and assumed responsibilities. We acknowledge the work of our “First Responders” Jim Cox and Mark Watson, and the promptness of others to jump in (Mike McGann, Dave Watts, and all others who show up to move microphones and camera (Catherine Stremlau, Tina Ray, etc.)
     One caution might be to try better to guarantee that Zoomers can hear the soft-spoken (Mike McMahon and Jim Cox, for instance).
 
Agenda Item 5: CTC meetings.  Shall we meet in December? Yes, for a Tea Ceremony for 30 minutes. Juanita Rice will set it up.    We also confirmed that the CTC meeting time limit is two hours.  And we CHANGED our start time from 12:30 to 1:00 pm to accommodate Juanita’s commitment to the Lincoln Sangha which meets from 10:30 to 11:30 am Sundays with occasional extension to 11:45. 
 
Agenda Item 6: CTC  Composition.  Are any members planning to step down at our normal term-ending (new year)? No real answer to this as no one expressed intention or wish to do so.  Should we invite other sangha members to join? Mike McGann spoke of the gained insight to the workings of our wonderful sangha.  We decided that everyone should know how the CTC is made up and the guidelines by which it operates so we will issue invitation.  Tina Ray volunteered to find a copy of the 2022 invitation and send it to the listserve.  It specifies the simple requirements for serving:  having attended sangha meetings for at least one year and having received transmission of the 5 Mindfulness Trainings as well as availability to commit to CTC meetings on the third Sundays each month (or most months).
 
And we adjourned.

**PS – You may notice the use of a gender-free pronoun to refer to BK who has expressed a wish NOT to be called “he” or “him” or to use “his.” We thus also are exploring avoidance of the words “Sister” and “Brother,” which formerly were intended to show respect for ordained Dharma Teachers.
     Especially in light of our intention to honor the voices and needs of “diversity” at our Winter Retreat, you may want to look back at our August 2022 CTC meeting minutes on the Honey Locust website for a discussion of he-she-they etc.
     That discussion may explain why at least some people on Zoom add to their nametags a designation of appropriate pronoun-genders:  Juanita, for instance, writes “(she/her)” after her name meaning that Juanita is most comfortable with female-gendered pronouns, but that she DOES recognize that others may wish to avoid the gendered he/she/him/her, etc. and would prefer the ungendered “they” and “them” and “theirs.”  Old grammar rules taught us to use the singular pronouns to refer to a specific person and even to use the masculine form in general: e.g., “A judge must govern his words.”  That was the rule, but it meant assumptions that are unkind and hurtful in some cases.  Why did we assume “a judge” was a “his/he/him”?  Because of the unimportance of women.  And how can we refer to a person whose gender we do not know?  By calling “it” or “him” or “her” whatever we guess.  Assume.  Why not avoid gender reference altogether then?  Because the GRAMMAR RULE is Binary AND masculine-ruled.  And many people do not live by that RULE.  (Mike McMahon calls this paragraph a step in the “difficult but beautiful dialogue.”)
      So we (your Care-Taking Council) dare to stand in support of all people who were suppressed and ignored by grammar rules.  Even if it sounds weird.
     Thus NOT Brother or Sister Terry and NOT Brother or Sister BK.  In some sense, it’s nobody’s\
Business.  Like Miss or Mrs.  And now even Mr.
Try it: it’s fun.
JR.
 

The Honey Locust Sangha / Omaha Community of Mindful Living is a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization. All funds donated help to fulfill the mission of practicing and raising awareness of the mindfulness practice in the Thich Nhat Hanh / Plum Village tradition.

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